The JHL Show!
by Demented and Disturbed
Summary: Welcome to The JHL Show! with Jayfeather, Lionblaze, and back for another round, Hollyleaf! WARNING: May include robberies, wrestler kits, crazy fourth wall breaking, and an unpaid intern.
1. In the Beginning, a Crazy Robbery

**I don't know why, I wanna write this warrior story. This is my second warriors fanfic, but this a show...with yours truly, Jayfeather, Lionblaze, and back for another round, Hollyleaf! Disclaimer!**

**Disclaimer:**

**Warriors belongs to Erin Hunter(which is in fact, a ****_ton_**** of people!) **

**Oakleaf, Spottedpelt, and the Securkitties belongs to me. Enjoy!**

Lights were slowly turned on as three cats were sitting in chairs and a camera was pointing at them. "Okay guys," A tom with brown fur and green eyes were telling them."You know what to do. In five, four, three, two-"

"Hello viewers!" A tom with an orange pelt told the camera."And welcome to _The JHL Show! _with your host, Lionblaze!" "Hey!" A she-cat with a light brown pelt with brown stripes and blue eyes walked on the stage."_I'm_ the host! _You're_ the unpaid interns!"

"But I thought Oakleaf was the unpaid intern!" The she-cat with a black shining pelt and green eyes pointed at the camera man-er cat."Yeah, I thought _I_ was the unpaid intern!" Oakleaf asked the host, before realizing."What, wait?"

"Listen, you and your 'special' brothers _are_ the co-hosts!" Spottedpelt told the Starclan warrior, which nodded her head."Now I understand!" The cat said."Can we start now, from the top!" Spottedpelt told the cameracat.

"We're live in five, four, three, two-" The three co-host and host stood up, smiling brightly."Hello, everyone out there in the clans! And welcome to _The JHL_ _Show!_ with your host, Spottedpelt from Windclan!"

The she-cat waved at the camera as the cats in the audience stomped their paws on the floor(they can't clap, anyways.)"And your co-hosts, Lionblaze, Jayfeather, and back from Starclan, Hollyleaf!" Spottedpelt stomped her paws on the floor with the crowd.

The three siblings stood up from the stomping and bowed politely."I LOVE YOU, JAYFEATHER!" A she-cat yelled as she threw roses from the crowd into Lionblaze's pelt, which stuck.

"Why, thank you," Jayfeather thanked no one as Lionblaze ran across the stage, screaming as Hollyleaf chased him."Let me take them out!" She yelled after him."I thought you were dead!" Lionblaze yelled back.

"I am!"

"Okay! How will you pull them out?"

"While they're busy," Spottedpelt told the crowd."We will be answering fanmail from you beautiful cats. First one is from...Sandstorm!" Who knew that cats could write?

_Hello, everyone!_

_I love your show. It's so original and the fact you added Hollyleaf makes me very excited for the next show!_

"Thank you, Sandstorm." Spottedpelt pulled out another fan letter from her bag of mystery(never trust anything inside that bag.)and looked at the address."This is from...Squirrelflight?"

_To Jayfeather, Lionblaze, and Hollyleaf,_

_I am deeply sorry for pretending I was your mom. I just wanted to help my sister out, y'know, we have one of those spiritual bongs that sisters and brothers usually have. Hope you forgive me!_

_Your aunt,_

_Squirrelflight_

"Don't worry," Jayfeather said to the camera."We all forgive you, even thought Hollyleaf killed the cat that love you but wanted revenge for picking Bramblestar over him."

"I had to!" Hollyleaf told her brother as she pulled out the thorns from Lionblaze's pelt."It was either that or be revealed to all the clans!"

"Yeah," Oakleaf said."She's right, in a way." "Shut up, unpaid intern."

"But I'm a cat too..."

"Next letter is from TIGERSTAR?" Lionblaze read."But I thought he died in _The Darkest Hour_ and got killed again in _The Last Hope_?" "I wonder who killed him?" Lionblaze thought aloud.

"DON'T. BREAK. THE FOURTH. WALL!" Oakleaf went over and slapped Lionblaze."This is a threat letter for a robbery._ Put your paws up in the air_. Why?"

"Cause this is a robbery!" The wall exploded, revealing two cats."Tigerstar and Hawkfrost! Why are you wearing socks on your head?" Oakleaf asked the robbers.

"Because, like, we couldn't, like find any masks, so we liked, did something else." Tigerstar explained to the confused cats."Securkitties!" Spottedpelt called and the entire police force came.

Tigerstar laughed at the force, which were kits dressed up like FBI Agents. They were too cheap to buy themselves one, so they improvised."Don't laugh at my kits, Windkit, Rabbitkit, and Birchkit! They're tougher than you think!" Spottedpelt told the robbery.

"How are they, like, totes going to stop us?" Hawkfrost laughed as well with his father. Spottedpelt smiled and told her kits:

"Sic them."

All of them yelled a battle cry and each of them hopped on the intruders."Girl, she like, digging her claws in my fur!" Tigerstar complained as Rabbitkit flipped him over."You like that?" Body slam!" He hopped on a chair and jumped down on Tigerstar hard, elbow first.

"Ow!" Hawkfrost cried out as the tag team of Windkit and Birchkit put his back legs on their necks and flipped him over. They joined their paws together and ran as Hawkfrost got up. The kits ran into him head on, flipping him again when he came in contact with the arms.

"We like, give up!" Tigerstar ran off, Hawkfrost trailing after him. The kits stood stiffly next to their mother, while the co-hosts were staring at them."What in the name of Starclan just happened?"Lionblaze asked Spottedpelt.

"They went to KWTC: Kit Wrestler Training Camp, founded by Brokenstar." Spottedleaf told the siblings."Okay," The three siblings said as they backed off.

"I think that's enough excitement for today," Spottedpelt turned to the camera."We need some cats for some jobs we have: Stage assistants, sound effects, lights, any kind of job you can think of!"

"Join us next time on: _The JHL Show!_ with your host: Spottedpelt!" The host smiled.

"AND US TOO!" The siblings yelled at her."Fine, and the special co-hosts: Jayfeather, Lionblaze, and Hollyleaf. Goodbye!"

**It will get funnier, I PROMISE ON LIONBLAZE'S LIFE! Review them OC's in for the jobs!**


	2. Getting back the COOKIES!

**I wanted to update this since this is a funny show. And we have a new cat joining us today: Leopardbreath!, who ironically belongs to Leopardbreath. Disclaimer Time!  
**

**Warriors belongs to Erin Hunter**

**Leopardbreath ironically belongs to Leopardbreath**

**Oakleaf and Spottedpelt belongs to me**

**LAST TIME ON: THE JHL SHOW!:**

**There was a robbery!**

_"DON'T. BREAK. THE FOURTH. WALL!" Oakleaf went over and slapped Lionblaze."This is a threat letter for a robbery. Put your paws up in the air. Why?"_

_"Cause this is a robbery!" The wall exploded, revealing two cats."Tigerstar and Hawkfrost! Why are you wearing socks on your head?" Oakleaf asked the robbers._

_"Because, like, we couldn't, like find any masks, so we liked, did something else." Tigerstar explained to the confused cats."Securkitties!" Spottedpelt called and the entire police force came._

_Tigerstar laughed at the force, which were kits dressed up like FBI Agents. They were too cheap to buy themselves one, so they improvised."Don't laugh at my kits, Windkit, Rabbitkit, and Birchkit! They're tougher than you think!" Spottedpelt told the robbery._

_"How are they, like, totes going to stop us?" Hawkfrost laughed as well with his father. Spottedpelt smiled and told her kits:_

_"Sic them."_

_All of them yelled a battle cry and each of them hopped on the intruders."Girl, she like, digging her claws in my fur!" Tigerstar complained as Rabbitkit flipped him over."You like that?" Body slam!" He hopped on a chair and jumped down on Tigerstar hard, elbow first._

_"Ow!" Hawkfrost cried out as the tag team of Windkit and Birchkit put his back legs on their necks and flipped him over. They joined their paws together and ran as Hawkfrost got up. The kits ran into him head on, flipping him again when he came in contact with the arms._

_"We like, give up!" Tigerstar ran off, Hawkfrost trailing after him. The kits stood stiffly next to their mother, while the co-hosts were staring at them."What in the name of Starclan just happened?"Lionblaze asked Spottedpelt._

**THIS TIME ON: THE JHL SHOW!:  
**

**The robbery _wasn't_ a bust...**

"See you next time on: THE JHL SHOW!" The cat-hosts waved as Oakleaf said,"Cut, print, wrap it!" "That was a good show, today!" Spottedpelt said as she hopped down from her chair and went over to the break station.

"Nice job on editing last week's," Lionblaze padded over to Oakleaf and tapped him on the back."Thanks!" Oakleaf went over to grab himself a cup of coffee(who knew cats could drink coffee?). Hollyleaf went over to her brother.

"We'll get great reviews from the other shows, like _Cooking with Spottedleaf!_"

"Or _The Idiot's guide to medicine_, _host by Cinderpelt_," Lionblaze padded along her and Jayfeather."I can't wait to have some cookies!" "Uh, guys?" Oakleaf asked as he pointed at Spottedpelt, who was on the ground.

"NOOOOOO! SHE WAS SO YOUNG!" Lionblaze collapsed on the ground and stared up in the rain."There's a murder case that must be solved." Jayfeather put on a detective hat and smoked a pipe. He became...Catlock Holmes.

"Guys, she's not dead. Just passed out." Oakleaf looked in the cookie jar."Oh, no...Now I know why she passed out." "Why?" The siblings asked.

"Because..." Oakleaf was mysteriously crowded over the cookie jar."Somecat...stole our COOKIES!" He held up the empty jar, as lightning and dramatic music played in the background. Lionblaze gasped, before fainting as well.

"I guess we know a suspect who stole the cookies..." Hollyleaf meowed, before Oakleaf covered her mouth. A cracking noise could be heard."What was that?" Jayfeather asked Oakleaf, who slowly moved his paw away from Hollyleaf's mouth.

"The fourth wall breaking," Oakleaf lifted up Spottedpelt and put her on a convenient couch."Now, you guys have to go to the Dark Forest and get the cookies Tigerstar took back." "But how are we gonna get there?" Lionblaze asked, who just woke up.

"I'll tell you how will get there..."Oakleaf smiled.

*****Random insert*****

"So..." Hollyleaf asked as she was tightly tied up back to back with her siblings."How do we get there?"

"Easy, alls I gots to do is hit you with Jayfeather's stick, and bada-bing, bada-boom, you're there."

He tied a camera around Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, and Lionblaze's neck."Might as well have a follow-up episode," He shrugged, raising Jayfeather's stick high up in the air."Any last words before you cross to the other side?"

"Yes, a couple actually," Hollyleaf asked."First of all, why are we doing this instead of buying cookies at the supermark-whack!" Oakleaf whacked all three of them. Before they passed out, Oakleaf yelled in their ears,"Remember! They're vanilla oreo cookies!"

*****Another random insert. Yay!*****

"Where are we?" Jayfeather rubbed his head as he and his siblings woke up in a dark and scary place."The Dark Forest," Lionblaze looked around."Where are we going to find vanilla cookies that Tigerstar stole?"

"In the conveniently placed headquarters," Hollyleaf pointed to a building that said _Conveniently Placed Headquarters_. "Wow, that was easy." Jayfeather walked up to the door, but Lionblaze stopped him."Whoa, stop for a minute."

"What?" Jayfeather asked, getting grumpy.

"First of all, you're going the wrong way," Lionblaze turned him to the door."Second of all, what if the door's booby-trapped? We have to sneak in."

"Fine, you sneak in," Hollyleaf suggested."While we find our own way."

"Fine! Go get caught!" Lionblaze answered as he went over to a random vent.

"Fine!"

*****Why the heck do I keep doing this insert?*****

Lionblaze was crawling through the vent, humming the _Mission Impossible_ Theme. He finally found a vent, grabbing his screwdriver and unscrewing the vent screw. When he fell in the lobby, he found Hollyleaf and Jayfeather already in the headquarters."How long have you been here?" Lionblaze asked.

"Oh, I don't know, 5 FLIPPIN' HOURS!" Hollyleaf put down her book, which was _Managing Your Secrets with Yellowfang_, and slapped Lionblaze in the face."Where were _you_? All we did was take the front door!"

"I got lost," Lionblaze replied. "First, I ended up in the elder's waiting room, which they slapped me for interrupting. Then, I 'somehow' ended up in the she-cats bathroom, and they slapped me..."

_Of course_, Hollyleaf thought."Finally, I ended up here!" Lionblaze finished, Jayfeather sleeping in the chair."This is a nice room," Lionblaze looked around. The walls were nicely covered in blue striped wallpaper, with Tigerstar posters hanging in some places. The warrior's waiting section had some magazines from _Kitties' Fashion_. The kit and apprentice's waiting section had some mossballs and some bracken to practice.

"Let's find Tigerstar," Hollyleaf padded up to the front desk, where a dark ginger she-cat was reading a magazine. Her icy blue eyes were dull."Hello, excuse me?" Hollyleaf pressed the bell and the she-cat looked up."Yes?" She said bored.

"Can you take us to Tigerstar, Miss..."

"Leopardbreath, but Tigerstar calls me Nobody-cares," Leopardbreath looked at Hollyleaf."Do I know you from somewhere?" She asked the Starclan warrior."I don't think you know me and my siblings."

"Wait...you're Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, and Lionblaze!" Leopardbreath's eyes glittered happily."I LOVE your show! I always wished that I would have a job there, instead of this mousebrained job my _mom_ got me."

"You do realize that we're _live_, right?" Lionblaze pointed to the camera on his neck.

"What?" Leopardbreath said sarcastically, before putting her face close to Lionblaze's camera."Mom, if you saw this, please don't be mad at me. I didn't mean it, really, please don't make me work at _McKitties_!"

"I'm just kitten; we're saving the batteries," Lionblaze smiled while Leopardbreath made a face as she looked through the directory."You're looking for Tigerstar; yeah, he's on the 30th floor."

"How much are you paying me?" Leopardbreath asked the siblings."Um, what?" Jayfeather asked her.

"Well, if I'm going to work there, how many mice are you paying me? Tigerstar _hardly_ pays me!"

"5 mice per hour?" Lionblaze asked the ginger cat.

"That's fine. But we have to disguise you, so that he wouldn't know it's you," Leopardbreath suggested. Lionblaze's mouth was about to open, but Leopardbreath stopped him."Yes, he knows you from when he trained you in the Dark Forest. Why would you ask that?"

"But what will you disguise us as?" Jayfeather asked Leopardbreath. Leopardbreath smiled evilly and turned to face them.

"Oh, I _know_ what I'm gonna disguise you as..."

*****Two hours...later*****

"You disguised us...as cats from PIZZAHUT?" Hollyleaf looked at her outfit, which was the Pizzahut waiter outfit."Of course; Tigerstar LOVES pizza. It'll work out!" Leopardbreath pressed the button on the elevator. "Up you go," The she-cat ushered them into the elevator.

"What do we do when we get up there?" Jayfeather asked, who was nicely dressed like the Pizzahut delivery man."Easy; tell him Nobody-cares sent him up with a free pizza."

"Alright," Everycat nodded."Anything we need to know before we go up?" Hollyleaf asked as she pressed the 30th floor button with her tail.

"Actually yeah," Leopardbreath started."Whatever you do, don't-" The elevator door shut before she could finish."What was she going to say?" Jayfeather asked his siblings.

"I don't know, but let's just enjoy the ride up," Lionblaze shrugged as everyone settled in. The trip, instead of Lionblaze said they were going to enjoy it, it was horrible. What Tigerstar would call 'A MASTAPIECE!', it was him screeching the words to _Problem_, by Ariana Grande.

When they got out, every one of them were cleaning out their ears with cotton swabs."What in the name of Starclan was _that_?"

"Now I know why Starclan denied him access," Lionblaze cleaned out his ears and put his hat back on."Okay, guys, remember what Leopardbreath told us."

"Act like we're giving Tigerstar a free pizza and while he's eating it, we steal our cookies back!" Lionblaze pounded his paw into his other paw."Okay," Hollyleaf nodded and went to the door, where Mapleshade and Hawkfrost were standing.

"State your business!" Mapleshade yelled at the three cats."Um...Krusty Kraaaaaaaaab pizza is the pizza for you and...MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Jayfeather sung with soul.

Mapleshade looked at him with dagger eyes, but she gruffly said,"Go ahead." She and Hawkfrost stepped aside and opened the door. The siblings walked in, the door shutting behind them.

"Who are you?" Tigerstar asked the cats as he turned around in his black swirly chair."We-uh-cats from Pizzahut, giving you-uh-a free pizza!" Lionblaze quickly came up with."That's good..." Tigerstar said in a deep voice.

"Why is that?" Hollyleaf asked, scared.

"Because..." Tigerstar got up."I am, like, totes hungry! Is this, like, free?" Tigerstar asked."Yeah, but-"

"You have to give them some vanilla cookies in return!" A voice yelled, and everyone turned to the cat who entered."Nobody cares? What are you, like, doing here?"

Leopardbreath was standing at the door."Just do it. Or I'll call Pinestar." She held up a phone, which was on Pinestar's phone number."Fine, Grandma!" Tigerstar groaned and gave them all the vanilla cookies.

"Yes!" Lionblaze fist-bumped, and when Tigerstar looked at them, he said."Yes! that we finally get...paid." Tigerstar opened the pizza box and smiled."Finally, I've been waiting for, like, forever!"

"I would get back if I would you..." Leopardbreath moved the siblings back toward the door."What are you-?" "Get ready to run..." Leopardbreath held the door open and the guards came running in."This is, like, gonna be so tasty!"

As soon as each of the guards got a slice and bit into it, it exploded."Run!" Leopardbreath opened the door and they all ran out, Tigerstar complaining,"Guards! Get them; the sauce is ruining my fur!"

The guards licked themselves out and chased the cats."Where did you learn that: the exploding pizza thing?" Jayfeather asked as he was dragged by Lionblaze.

"From a T.V. show!" Leopardbreath jumped over a plastic plant."Which one?" Lionblaze asked."Thunderclan's got talent!" She answered.

(**A.N By the way, check it out! It's really good and funny!**)

The cats ran down the stairs, where some guards were waiting at the bottom."What do we do now?" Lionblaze said with worry."Squirrel!" Leopardbreath pointed at the window and the guards looked at it in interest.

"Follow me," Leopardbreath sneaked out the front door, the siblings following him. When they got out, they looked around."How do we get out of here?" Hollyleaf looked around alertly.

"The conveniently placed elevator that takes you to the real world," Leopardbreath pointed to an elevator that said _Conveniently Placed Elevator that takes you to the Real World._"How lucky are we?" Lionblaze asked as he stepped in the elevator, his sister and Leopardbreath following him.

Jayfeather was about to get on, when suddenly, Tigerstar burst out of the door, an angry expression on his face."You are, like, SO fired, Nobody Cares!" "Good, 'cause I quit!" Leopardbreath took off the tag and threw it on the ground. The elevator doors started to close.

"Curse word!" Leopardbreath yelled and Tigerstar stopped."You don't use language like that here, young lady! I'll-" The elevator doors shut and they started to move."The studio, here we come!" Jayfeather said as they saw the light.

*****The studio*****

Oakleaf was fanning Spottedpelt, who was on the couch."The cookies-not the cookies!" Spottedpelt rolled around on the couch, just as the elevator dinged and the cats walked out."You're back!" Oakleaf exclaimed when he saw the co-hosts."Did you get the cookies?"

"Yep!" Jayfeather pulled out the cookies, stealing one to eat."Good job!" Oakleaf went over to Spottedpelt and gave her a cookie."And just in time, too; Spottedpelt was getting delirious. And who is this?" He pointed at Leopardbreath.

"This is-" Lionblaze started, but Leopardbreath stopped him."My name's Leopardbreath. I used to work at a M&M factory, but I was quickly fired for throwing away all the W's. I'm also a part-time psychic for the clans. I wish to work here."

"And would you like to work as sounds and lights? It pays 5 mice per hour," Oakleaf held up some headphones."Yes, please!" Leopardbreath put on the headphones."You must be accepted into the T.V. business!" Spottedpelt pulled out a staff and stood up.

"Go down on one knee," Spottedpelt ordered and Leopardbreath did as she asked."Miss. Leopardbreath, do you promise to have responsibility for the awesomeness of being sound and lights?"

"I do,"

"Then, I dub thee Lady Leopardbreath of sounds and lights!" Spottedpelt whacked her with the staff, which the new employee replied,"Ow!" "Deal with it. She's crazy!" Oakleaf whispered in her ear.

"We need some more employees, so next week we have to put out a commercial!" Spottedpelt went over and started to eat some vanilla cookies."You heard her! Let's get started!"

Oakleaf pushed Hollyleaf, Jayfeather, and Lionblaze out the door."And make sure you find some cats!" He called out, and shut the door.

**Like Oakleaf and Spottedpelt said, we need more cats! So send in them cats! Also, I want them to review some cats, so who do you want them to review?**

**1. Bluestar,**

**2. Yellowfang, or three,**

**3. Dovewing?**

**Put it in the reviews below. Hope you enjoyed and ciao!**


End file.
